Bed of Lies (Bed of Thornes Trilogy Book 2) Page 7

  I'm ready to fix what is either the worst mistake that I've made so far in life or the best decision, whichever it turns out to be, I'll be satisfied that I made the effort to figure it out before it turned into the biggest regret ever. Not knowing is a horrible feeling. Not understanding, not getting to the bottom of what it all meant. I don't mind to be the fool if that's what it takes to find out the truth behind it all. If I was honestly just a toy, just a game she used to occupy her sick mind. I'm aware that's what it could turn out to be. I'm also prepared for that this time. This is the final round in my fight for love. She can take it or leave it, but I'm not going out without this one last battle to get the answers for both of our sake's. She deserves this as much as I do. I can say that because I love her and care about what's best for her. She may need me more than she realizes, to help her cope with this disease of addiction, and to be there for her when she's alone and weak. Don't get me wrong, this is a very strong woman who thinks she doesn't need anyone. That's the thing, it could be a cry for help. This is all part of what needs to be brought to the light.

  We don't need each other to live, but to live we may need each other. Welcome to our world of contradictions. That's the struggle of her and I. It's like one big fucking cycle of need but don't need, it makes no sense. Hell, love doesn't always make sense. I've heard that love only prevails when it's meant to be, so this is it. There's no more guessing once the final battle is fought. No matter the outcome, I'm going to continue to grow and steady myself for the things I aspire for in life. I refuse to let anything keep me from being me. Love no longer has a hold on me, I'm taking the reins of my life, and love will be a part of it only if it can be contained correctly. Unconditional love is only real for those that believe in loving without boundaries. That no matter what, they will love the person. I've not been proven to that it exists, but maybe my expectations are set far too high for a young man that hasn't been through as much in life as some have. It probably takes a lot of trials to go through before seeing that it's possible to love the way you do when it's unconditional.

  I'd like to get there before I die. To feel the feeling before it's too late. To know what it is to love and be loved, to be in a committed relationship that means there is trust and stability, to be in love so deeply that nothing else matters, and to love in a manner that is unconditional through thick and thin. It's said that it's better to have love and lost than to never have loved at all. Well, I'll find out for myself before my days are done. I feel like we all deserve to know the truth. Life has enough unanswered questions and there's no reason to make it any more difficult than it already is. I'm not taking the result of my quest as a win or a loss. I'm going to take it as a victory of simply knowing. I can only hope Veronica will appreciate my intentions and see it for what it truly is because it's not only me in this, it's us. This is my gift to myself and to this beautiful woman that stole my heart with more than just her powerful pussy.

  My phone buzzes from an incoming text. It's Jenna.

  Hey if we're still on to meet up today for that favor, I'll be at Bistro 31 around noon for lunch.

  Order a coffee for me. I'll see you there. I reply.

  K. You got it. Thnx again.

  No problem.

  Mason probably wouldn't trust me around his lady right now, not after all the fuck ups he's known about, but I could never do that to him and it's not like I want to sex every woman I encounter. I'm just glad he's unaware of this or it would be uncomfortable for both ends I'm sure. I throw my laundry in the washer and clean up my place as I wait for it to get closer to the time I need to head out. I haven't picked up in here since I went through the great depression and it's repulsive. I need a clean start in every sense of the phrase. I can't remember the last time I went for a run, maybe I'll jog to my meeting with Jenna instead of driving. I could use some exercise for more reasons than one. The time passes by and I head out earlier than planned to get there in time since I'm not on wheels.

  “Did you seriously run here?” Jenna asks with a laugh as I approach where she's sitting outside of the bistro.

  “The best thing about Texas is even in November we have these beautiful days.” I respond breathlessly. “I use to run five days a week. I haven't bothered since Veronica came into my life. She was enough exercise at the time, but then she left and I've become a lazy shit that needs to get off my ass for once.” I grin.

  “I can't imagine what your stamina level would be if she did come back around.” She laughs.

  “Why do you think I'm running instead of driving?” I smirk.

  “Well you better hope you get results fast.” She bites her lip as if she has more to tell me.

  “What are you saying?” I ask as I sit down in the chair across from her.

  “She's here, back in town... she came home Adrian.”

  “What? How long has she been here?” My heart races from the news.

  “I'm not exactly sure when she arrived, but she called me shortly after I text you this morning and she talked about more than I could take in all at once. It was like she was panicking or something.”

  “What did she say?” I take a sip of the coffee that was waiting for me on the table when I got here. The anxiety of the sudden news has a grip on me and I attempt to hide it from Jenna.

  “Like I said, she did a lot of talking, so I can't recap everything but I can tell you as much as I can recall from what she wanted to tell you before you left Paris but didn't have the chance to. She said she'd tried to call you before you left the country but you didn't answer. I told her your phone was messed up at the time so the calls weren't going through due to that, not because you were ignoring her. I guess she felt badly about what happened while you were there and had to get it out somehow, so she turned to me because she felt it was too late to get through to you. I have no idea if she'd want me to relay what was said or not, but I figure at this point what can it hurt?”

  “If you don't want to tell anything out of fear of breaking the confidentiality between the two of you, then by all means, don't. I'm not asking you to do anything you're not comfortable with. It means more to me that you don't harm your friendship with her than to tell me something that I can live without knowing if need be.” I briefly pause. “Just so you know.” I smile.

  “I respect that. I normally wouldn't do anything to conflict with the trust I have built with anyone, but this is just ridiculous... it's things that shouldn't be said to me, but rather to you. It's this back and forth that you two have had going on for far too long. It's the honesty that you both need and have failed at. I'm not a middle-man and I'm not a consultant. All I can do is choose that this isn't beyond repair, you and her, and I feel that it's only fair for you to know something that may make or break whatever it is you have with her. It's not worth hiding.”

  “Your decision to tell me and your reason why is as important to me as knowing what was said. Thank you for being so honest and mature about this. I wish I could say the same about Veronica and I. If it were the case, you wouldn't be put in the middle the way you have.” I take a drink of the coffee and prepare myself for what I'm about to hear.

  “She slept with others. She didn't want to admit this because you obviously mean more to her than she's allowed herself to be aware of until now. She's scared of commitment for reasons she didn't fully explain, but said she's working on those reasons for herself and for the sake of ever having a relationship. When she made the choices of sleeping with other men, she was unaware of many things at the time, including her own feelings. Her eyes have opened since and she regrets those choices but has no way to turn it all around or make it right. She knows she hurt you. Since you two weren't in a commitment, and due to her leaving, it didn't seem wrong at the time. Apparently she's reconsidered that notion because she now feels awful about it.” She pauses to take a drink. “I don't know the details of what happened while you were over there, not even Mason let me in on it. I really never asked to know. It's between you a
nd her, and that's fine. What I do know is that, from what I can gather out of what was told to me, she does have love for you. She's fighting with whatever it is that's attacking her either mentally or emotionally but she's not against you, no matter how it looks. So the sleeping with other men thing, it hurt her to know it hurt you, let that be enough to show you what type of heart she really has.”

  Before I get a word out, Jenna's phone rings.

  “It's Veronica.” She says before she answers.

  I can only hear here end of the conversation so I wait until they're finished talking to find out what's up. Within a few seconds, she hangs up.

  “That was short.” I say.

  “Um, yeah... it was odd as well. She just called to ask what I was doing and if I could meet her right now, said she needed help carrying something. I told her I was busy with Mason at the moment but could help her later if she could hold out. Then she hung up on me.”

  At the same time Jenna stops talking, my phone rings. I don't recognize the number but answer anyway.

  “Hello?”

  “You may not want to hear from me but I need to talk to you. I'm not sure if you've been told, I'm back in Dallas. Can we get together so we can talk in person?” Veronica says on the other end.

  “I do want to talk... but... is there a way we can meet up later?”

  “Well I was hoping that we could now if possible. Are you busy? I could kind of use a little help moving something too if you wouldn't mind.”

  “My boss isn't going to let me leave until this delivery is finished. I can give you a call as soon as it's done if that's cool... hello? Veronica?”

  I look at Jenna with a crooked face and tell her what she said. “Then she hung up on me too.”

  “What the hell?” Jenna's face is as crooked as mine from the confusion the phone calls caused.

  “Whatever that was all about. She couldn't even say bye before hanging up?”

  We shake it off and finish up at the bistro so we can search for a gift for Mason. My mind draws a blank at first because I want to think of something that would be appropriate from Jenna to him as well as something for such a good man that has everything he needs in life. I find this impossible. I'm not sure a gift like this even exists on this planet. We go into a few stores and see nothing that catches the eye. Then we try out a newer shop that's on the downtown strip to see if they may have something in the range of what we're on the hunt for.

  “Maybe something like this?” She holds up a picture frame that you can has personalized.

  “That would be nice if you have a picture that means something to him to put in it.”

  “I don't even know what I would have engraved on it.” She shakes her head and places it back up on the shelf she took it down from.

  “I'm thinking along the lines of a chest.”

  “A chest?”

  “Yeah, you know, one he can keep things in that mean a lot to him. Like for safe keeping. I don't know, it's different. This is a man that has all he wants and needs in life, a man that's satisfied with all he has. We want unique, not the typical gifts people get men. So it's what I could think of and there's plenty to choose from right over there.” I point out the lineup of various sized and shaped chests.

  “What would he put in it though?” She asks as she walks over to them to check them out.

  “Anything he wants. Over the years, he'll most likely put his most cherished keepsakes in it. Maybe even one day something he can hand down should he have children.”

  “I see. Well that does seem like something to get someone who has it all. Plus I'm growing tired of looking, especially when it's all the same... things he already owns or just doesn't have use for.”

  “Good. Let's pick one out that you like or think he'll like the best and ring it up. I think they'll even wrap a bow and deliver if you would want them to.”

  Jenna looks back and forth between a couple of the dozen sitting in a line, then finally chooses the black and gray one that has silver details carved all around it. I think it's very fitting and he's going to like the thought put into it without question. We bring it up to the register and check out.

  “Thanks so much for doing this with me today. I don't think I would've ever found anything if it weren't for your ideas. He more than likely would've ended up with cologne.” She chuckles.

  “It's no problem for real, plus I owed you so I was obligated.” I laugh as we walk to her car for her to get in. “Hey, that chest is going to make a nice hiding spot for his porn stash, he'll really appreciate it.”

  “Adrian!”

  “Kidding!” I duck a little and laugh as she threatens to throw her wallet at me. “Don't hurt me!”

  “Ass.” She laughs. “Hey, you want a ride home?”

  “Nah. Think I'm gonna make the run back. Now that I know Veronica's back in town, I need the exercise more than ever.”

  We both laugh it out and say our goodbye's and I watch as she pulls away before I start my jog back home. The thought of Veronica keeps me at a steady pace the entire way. I'm hoping that she'll still want to talk with me by the time I try to call her after I shower. I'm also hoping that there's a chance at making all of this right for once. My speed picks up at the thought of it all and I get to the house out of breath. Damn I'm in need of some stamina... badly.

  I tried for the rest of the day to call Veronica and got nothing. She didn't answer and didn't bother to call back. I slump into my couch and turn on the TV, trying anything to keep my mind from going to negative thoughts. I get up to cook some dinner and my phone starts to ring so I sit back down to answer it when I see it's Jenna.

  “So apparently she seen us meeting earlier today.” Jenna says. “She thinks that we've been seeing one another all of this time and doesn't want to speak to either of us.”

  “What?! Where did she get that concept?”

  “I don't know, but she was watching us when she called our phones and knows we lied to her about what we were up to. She said that gives her reason to believe we've been going behind her and Mason's backs with each other.”

  “I told you she's crazy. I can't believe she would even come up with something so ridiculous. To think of all the lies and secrets I've dealt with on her end, she has a lot of balls to pull some shit like this. Did you tell her what we were meeting for?”

  “She wouldn't calm down enough for me to get a word in. She just kept bringing up that there must be something we're hiding if we felt we had to lie to her. She told me that she was hurt that her best friend and the man who claims he loves her would do such a thing. I tried to tell her, she wouldn't listen. I don't know what to do now.”

  “I don't know if she's out to play games or if she's that afraid that she thought she had to go this far, but I can't play this shit any longer. I'm going to track her ass down and make her listen. I've had enough.”

  “Good luck. I tried to swing by her house as soon as she hung up on me, because I thought she would hear me out more in person, but she wasn't there. I wasn't sure where else to check so I called you.”

  “I have a few places in mind but I can't say whether she'll actually be at any of them or not. It's worth a shot, this has got to be figured out. Tonight.”

  “Well give me a call if you get a chance because I'm worried as hell. The last thing I need is to lose my man if she tells him this shit and to lose my best friend over something not even true.”

  “I got you. Don't worry, this will all be worked out before it comes to that. I promise.”

  We hang up and I rush out the door. Veronica, I hope you're ready for a reality check.

  ~ ~ ~

  The first place I stop by is the gallery. I assume this is where she'd be if anywhere since her studio is in the back and I know painting helps her vent. When I pull up I don't see her car but I check the building anyway in case she had walked or used another form of transportation. There's no sign of her anywhere around or in the building that I can tell, no lights are on a
s far as I can see. I don't believe she's here. I get back in the car and go to the next place I have in mind, the Alophus Hotel. I know she told me before that she visits frequently to be inspired, and since she's been gone so long, I thought she may have wanted to get away to one of her favorite spots in the city. I get inside the hotel and approach the front desk.

  “Is there any possible way I can find out if a friend of mine has checked in here? She's pretty well known around this place and checks in often. Her name is Veronica Thorne.”

  The hostess seems to be new and looks afraid to answer. “I'm sorry sir, there's no way I could give out such information. I'm sure my supervisor would tell you the same, but if you'd like me to go get them...”

  “No that's all right. I understand. Just do me a favor if you will, if for some reason she is checked in here, please let her know that Adrian came looking for her and to call me right away. It's very important.” I turn to walk away with frustration built up in me.

  “I'll be sure to relay the message should she be available to tell.”

  “Thank you.” I say and hurry out of the door.

  Well whether she's there or not, I don't know, but something tells me that she's not. Even if she is or does end up there at some point tonight, I doubt the young girl at the front desk will remember or bother to tell her. Then it'd be up to Veronica to call, which is on my list of doubtful scenarios. I leave it as a lost cause and continue my search. There's really only one other place in mind... if she's not there then I can't think of anywhere else in this big city she would be at that I'd know of. I end up at the final spot and realize how late it is that they're closed, the bistro downtown. I'm at a standstill. Maybe I should drop by her house and check again, it's been awhile since Jenna checked there, she could be home by now.